When you’re a kid, you always hope the tooth fairy leaves you a little more than your parents promised.
After all, pieces of you are falling out of your head and you’d think each piece would be worth more than a quarter or fifty cents.
When I was a kid, a quarter was all I’d get and even though twenty-five cents meant a lot more back then, it still felt a little low. The compensation just seemed a little off, in my young eyes.
I remember asking my parents if I could keep growing and losing new teeth over and over, and if the bigger ones might be worth MORE. I wouldn’t even have to work!
They thought that was a funny idea but of course, not quite plausible. And they also laughed at the idea of more money for each tiny tooth, so I was out of luck.
But I never got a letter from the tooth fairy, formally addressing my request for a salary increase.
That’s what happened to this little boy and the ensuing picture is just exploding all over the internet…because it’s just so damn hilarious. He wasn’t happy with $1 for his tooth; he wanted $5.
So, the fairy replied and here’s the ensuing Reddit post:
The start of the letter is fantastic:
“My name is Dee Kay. My associate Tooth Fairy told me about your letter and I have been assigned to your case, #092208-5.”
Dee Kay (the Director of the Department of Dental Disturbance) then explains that although the boy’s full request cannot be fulfilled, they can give him a $1 increase per lost tooth if the tooth in question is cavity free.
C’mon, that’s not a bad deal at all!
Of course, there’s a flip side that coin: If the tooth DOES have a cavity, that results in a fee:
“Our CTO (central tooth officer) S. Cary Gums would shut down the DDD (Department of Dental Disturbance) if we even attempted to bring a CFT [cavity filled tooth] back, and that would mean no TPO’s [tooth pay outs] for children anywhere.
I know you wouldn’t want to be the cause of that.”
See now, this makes perfect sense. It’s funny but hey, great incentive to brush your teeth and not stuff yourself with candy.
Talk about genius.